Rocknrollchick: Dont be. Doctors are good, George'll get better.

Seashell_Eyes_Julia: But what if he doesnt? The papers say his cancer is getting worse. Cancer could kill him.

Rocknrollchick: He'll get better, Jules, he's George Harrison for god's sake.

Seashell_Eyes_Julia: Don't you get it? He could die!

Seashell_Eyes_Julia signed off at 8:42 pm.

          Julia signed off the internet in a hurry. Melanie didn't understand. As Julia opened the door of her bedroom, she recalled the night before.

          "He won't live til Christmas," her father had said. He was laughing at her.

          "Dad, how could you say that?" Julia felt tears stinging her eyes. Her father continued laughing. Julia left the dinner table and fled to her bedroom.

          She shut the door and locked it, stuffing towels in the crack below the door to muffle her sobs. In a panic, she opened the drawer of her nightstand. Tears fell from her eyes as she pulled out a razor blade. Julia sat on her bed, sobbing. 'I'm such a bitch,' Julia thought. 'Why am I crying?'

          Julia looked helplessly at a poster of George Harrison, and back down at the sharp blade. She put the blade to the soft flesh of her wrist. She ran the blade along her wrist back and forth, slicing open old cuts from previous nights of her father's painful words. She looked back up at her poster of George hesitantly. She dropped the blade and reached for a handful of tissues. Julia pressed it to her wrist to soak up the blood. 'Why do I do this to myself?' she thought in despair.

          Julia glanced down at these cuts now, and as she reached for her nightstand she spoke aloud. "No, I won't do it. I have to stop this."

          Julia lay on her bed and for the first time in a long while, she prayed. "Lord God, I havent talked to you in a while, but I hope you'll listen to me. George Harrison has cancer. It's really bad. He can't leave me. I need him. Without him I'll die. I might actually do it. God save him, I need George," Julia whispered as she cried herself to sleep.

*       *       *

Melanie signed off the internet in confusion at Julia's negative conversation. She had only said those things because she thought that was what Julia wanted to hear. Melanie wasn't really sure what would happen to George, but she hoped things would turn for the better.

          She not only feared for George's life, she feared for Julia's as well. Julia was her best friend although they lived hundreds of miles apart. They had met online through the common bond of Beatle-loving. But as they got to know each other, Julia told Melanie of her broken family. Melanie lay in bed as she recalled this moment.

Subj: Something you should know...

Date: 4/18/01

From: Seashell_Eyes_Julia@yahoo.com

To: paul_luvr618@hotmail.com

Hey Mel!

You've become a great friend of mine and I thought you should know something. My mother dies last year in a car accident, and we were very close. My father and I had never been very close, and when mom died I wanted nothing to do with anyone, especially him. I locked myself in my room. I became depressed. That's when I began to cut. I've never done anything really serious to myself, but cutting helps to relieve my inner suffering. Since I've started, I have tried to stop. My father likes to joke with everyone. But sometimes his jokes can be extremely hurtful. That's what gets me started again. My saviour from all this is you, Mel.

Just wanted you to know that.

Peace and love, Julia

          After Melanie had received the email, she had begun to take Julia's comments of "I hate my life" more seriously. If George died. . . Julia might kill herself.

          Melanie shivered at the thought. Melanie glanced at the clock on her dresser. It was almost 9 o'clock, which meant it was near 10 at Julia's. 'Please don't do anything tonight, Julia,' she thought. She did this every night, and every night Julia would do it. Melanie hoped that one day, Julia would stop.

          She went downstairs as an idea came into her head. "Mom," she said. "Do you think we could visit New York sometime?"

*       *       *

The next morning, Julia awoke from surprisingly sound slumber. But what woke her up surprised her more. She picked up her ringing phone with a weak gesture. "Hello?" she said into the receiver. She heard a low sobbing on the other end.

          "Julia?" a voice said.

          "Yes..." Julia said uncertainly.

          "Jules, this is Mel."

          "Mel! How nice of you to call...why the hell so early? It must be 5 o'clock your time!" Julia paused and the sobbing grew louder. "Are you crying?" she asked.

          "Turn on your radio," Melanie wept.

          Julia snapped on her radio and "Here Comes the Sun" played through the speakers. She was puzzled and said nothing.

          "George is dead," Melanie wailed.

          "Oh my god. . ." Julia gasped. Tears swelled up in her eyes; tears of hate, tears of despair. "Oh my god. . ." Julia repeated as she hung up the phone.